Monday, June 2, 2008

A Bit of a Slump

Well, I survived.

It wasn't too bad. The beginning was a little tough, since the first two people to arrive were the new moms (and their infants of course), and I started feeling almost claustrophobic, like I was suffocating under the presence of tiny infant cuteness. Thankfully, then T (who's 14 weeks today :) arrived, but she's so awesome and didn't announce her pregnancy, and that just made me feel a lot better.

I was pretty proud of myself for participating in discussions on cloth diapers vs. Pampers and slings vs. baby backpacks. I did well on those.

But after that, news of 3 pregnancies the next day has got me kind of down. It feels like everywhere pregnancies are popping up, and we're being left behind in the dust. I just feel...well, mopey and sad. Too mopey and sad to even blog about being mopey and sad.

I just feel like running away and hiding. And pretending like I don't have to think about not having a baby every single day.

I just feel tired. And we've just barely begun.

11 comments:

Emily (Apron Strings) said...

Being as strong as you were, I'm not surprised your physically and emotionally tired. I give you tons of credit for going. AND ... you're right. You DID survive!

(((HUGS)))

Mrs. Spit said...

Some days just standing up is a great acomplishment. Sounds like you did well.

scarredbellybutton said...

You are FAR braver than I!

Being infertile is hard work, especially when surrounded by fertiles, no wonder you are tired.

loribeth said...

Glad you survived. I think you're incredibly brave for going in the first place!! No wonder you feel tired! (((hugs))) & I hope you don't have to do anything like that again anytime soon.

Steph said...

You are so strong for completing this obstacle. Sending you many virtual hugs!!! I know infertility can be so devastating but then to be surrounded by beautiful toddlers and preggy bellies is so hard. You are one amazing person to get through that!!

JuliaS said...

Wow - that's all I'm gonna say - is wow - you survived that. Of course you are exhausted.

Here from nclm.

~Jess said...

I'm blown away that you were able to deal with all of those factors...I don't know if I could have.

Thanks for your comment on my blog *hugs*

Pepper said...

Glad you survived what could have been a tortuous afternoon. You certainly are a better person than I am!

Hang in there. It's so very hard to be the one left behind, but you are working on it, doing everything you can do, and your BFP may not be far away at all.

sara said...

You ending where you say, I'm so tired and we've only just begun is so so true. That is the feeling I had most when we were doing our IVF cycle, and actually leading up to that too. I kept telling my husband, not only am I physically tired, but emotionally I'm so exhausted I have nothing left to give...but we've just started. So I hear ya, and will be thinking of you.

Duck said...

you are one strong lady! no way i could go to a child birth/pregnancy class being in my infertile state. you go girl.

Jill said...

This is EXACTLY how I've been feeling this week. It feels like, with every new baby or new pregnancy, a new weight is being placed on my shoulders and it's getting harder to stand up. ((HUGS))